
If I Choose Abortion, How Will the Decision Impact Me Now and in the Future?
While the gift of time is priceless when making a big decision, it’s also important to consider the various outcomes to the “forever” decisions you are considering making. Be informed and think through all possible outcomes before coming to a decision about abortion. Look at all the details of how this decision could impact you not just today, but a week, year or even 20+ years from now.
Ask Yourself, How Long Will This Crisis Last? Look at Each Possible Outcome.
For example, a woman learns she is pregnant and just started college. The initial thought may be, “How could I go to school and care for a baby?” Abortion may sound like a simple answer. After all, you know women who have had abortions and they seem fine. Life will go on. While life does go on, that’s not the whole picture.
Emotional Risks
The truth is, abortion related PTSS (post traumatic stress syndrome) is real and affects a large number of women with symptoms often manifesting years after the abortion.
Emotional symptoms include, but are not limited to:
- Guilt
- Grief
- Shame
- Anxiety
- Depression
- Low Self-Esteem
- Relationship Issues
- Intimacy Issues
- Thoughts of Self Harm
- Anger Toward Self and Others
- Fear
Physical Risks
There are medical risks* of having an abortion to consider:
- Incomplete Abortion
- Blood Clots in the Uterus
- Heavy Bleeding (hemorrhage)
- Cut or Torn Cervix
- Perforation of the Uterus Wall
- Anesthesia Related Complications
- Painful Cramping
There are also long-term consequences to abortion often not talked about. Many women struggle with infertility, have increased risk of ectopic pregnancy, or struggle with new or increased substance or alcohol abuse.
It’s Important To Have All the Facts When Making a “Forever” Decision.
Now let’s look at the example situation again, you’re in college, pregnant and feel abortion is your only option. Use that gift of time to really think through all options to this forever decision. The crisis you may find yourself in today, may look much more manageable tomorrow. Abortion is a forever decision, one we cannot undo.
Learn From Others
As you make a decision, also consider talking with someone who has experienced abortion and can provide an honest assessment of their experience. At First Care we are happy to put you in touch with our staff or others who have experienced abortion and can answer some of your questions.
Some of the women who have come through our post-abortion healing program have shared their stories with us, including the following thoughts about their abortion decision:
“I wish with all my being, I could take back what I did.”
“They all said I would be okay after…but I’m not.”
“20 years later, I still struggle with great depression and grief.”
“I feel selfish…I feel stupid for getting pregnant in the first place…Before this I never believed in abortion… I have let myself and my family down…”
“After the abortion, I looked in the mirror and didn’t recognize myself.”
“I felt like a monster for killing my child.”
“Looking back at the situation, I could have had my baby and been okay.”
Find Support
If you are worried about how carrying a pregnancy may impact your future goals and plans for your life, we have staff available to help you talk through those concerns. We also have a variety of resources we can help connect you with as well.
We won’t tell you what to do or not do.
We won’t pressure you.
We will provide a place for you to process and think through the impact of your pregnancy decision now and in the future so you can make a well informed decision that you’ll feel positive about today and in the future.
Schedule an Appointment
Schedule an appointment for Options Counseling to talk with someone about your options.
*taken from “If You are Pregnant” from the Minnesota Department of Health
Learn More4 Things to Consider Before Scheduling an Abortion
If you are pregnant and are considering abortion, here are four things to consider before making any decision for your pregnancy.
#1: Am I Actually Pregnant?
In the pregnancy center world, “viable” means that baby is implanted in the uterus and there is a heartbeat. Approximately 8-20% of pregnancies end in miscarriage according to Mayo Clinic. It is important to make sure your pregnancy is viable so you don’t have to go through the unnecessary medical procedure of having an abortion.
Here at First Care we offer free lab-quality pregnancy tests and ultrasounds to help you confirm you have a viable pregnancy and determine how far along you are.
#2: What Types of Procedures are Available to Me and What are the Associated Risks?
There are different abortion procedures available depending on how far along you are. Take time to understand the medical procedures and potential risks involved. Schedule an appointment today to meet with a trained staff member and discuss the risks and procedures of an abortion.
#3: How Could an Abortion Impact My Future?
Many women say they experience a deep emotional impact after abortion. For some, feelings of regret or grief come right away. For others, these or other feelings come later in life; during a subsequent pregnancy, or after they have raised their children and are in a new stage of life.
No matter when these emotions impact a woman, it can be difficult to come to terms with the finality that comes with abortion. For many women, it’s not as they hoped; life doesn’t go back to the way it was before the abortion. It is important to think through the long-term effects an abortion could have on your life today and 5, 10, and 20 years from now.
#4: Have I Considered All My Options?
You have three choices when experiencing an unplanned pregnancy: have an abortion, place for adoption, or parent. All options are life-changing choices that only you can make. Take time and make an informed decision. Whatever decision you make now will impact your future. Whatever advice you’ve been given, you owe it to yourself and your future to stop and give yourself time to process.
First Care offers free pregnancy options counseling. We will listen to your fears, dreams, and uncertainty. You will gain a better understanding of your options and get the support you deserve.
Remember you are not alone!
Whether you choose abortion, parenting, or adoption, it is a forever decision that will change your life. We are here to support you as you take that next step. Schedule an appointment to talk with someone today.
Learn MoreReasons You May Be Considering Abortion
What are the Reasons Abortion Seems Like the Best Option for Me?
Often in life when we encounter something unexpected our first thought is, “How am I going to make this work?” At First Care, we realize that same reaction applies to an unplanned pregnancy. We recognize an unplanned pregnancy comes with a range of emotions including: shock, emotional numbness, disappointment, fear, anxiety or stress.
When all of these thoughts and feelings get mixed up together, we may look for an escape; a way to erase or undo the situation we find ourselves in. For some women, abortion feels like the only option due to their life circumstances.
Do Any of These Reasons Apply To Your Situation?
- You feel like you do not have everything in order the way you imagined before having children
- You might already have children and adding another child feels too overwhelming
- You may feel like things are too tight financially to have a child
- You may not have adequate housing
- You may be temporarily without a job
- You may want to finish school and believe having a baby would get in the way of your goals
- You feel like you do not have enough support from the baby’s father or your parents/other family members
If you are dealing with even one of the reasons listed above, it’s understandable why abortion may feel like the only way forward. But it’s important to allow yourself time to make a well-informed decision. Put your decision making in perspective.
Honestly Ask Yourself a Few Key Questions That Will Help You Identify Why Abortion Seems Like the Best Way Forward and Help Bring Clarity to Your Decision Making Process:
- Why do I feel abortion is the best option for me?
- Would I consider a different option if my circumstances were different?
- What problem(s) am I hoping abortion will solve?
- Would I feel differently about this decision 5 years from now? 10 years from now?
- What concerns do I have about continuing the pregnancy?
- Have I thoroughly explored all of my options – including adoption and parenting – and know what resources are available to me?
If your circumstances are the primary reason you are considering abortion, know that circumstances can change. Also know there are a variety of community resources and organizations designed to support moms in our community (including our programs here at First Care Pregnancy Center).
Schedule an Appointment
Schedule an appointment today to meet with one of our staff for Options Counseling to process your decision in a confidential and nonjudgmental environment.
Learn MoreMen: You Have a Choice too
First Care is here for both you and your partner. If you are facing an unplanned pregnancy, you will have some big decisions to make.
Your Voice Matters
It is important to communicate your thoughts to your partner and have a discussion about what each of you thinks is best. You are part of this pregnancy and what you think, feel and want matters. In fact, your opinion may be the most influential to your partner.
While you may think the best thing you can do is tell your partner that you will “support her no matter what”, that actually can communicate the opposite -that it is all her responsibility and her “problem” to figure out. Offer to go with your partner to the pregnancy test and/or ultrasound and educate yourself on all of your options as a potential father.
The two of you have many decisions to make and the more you can make them together, the better. Regardless of the decision you and your partner make for the pregnancy, the choice will impact you.
Offering Support
Your support is one of the most valuable things you can offer the mother of your child. Having an unplanned pregnancy can be a tough and painful situation. But this is your opportunity to live up to your responsibility and see exactly what you are made of: courage!
While abortion may seem like a quick fix to an unexpected pregnancy, there are potential physical risks for your partner in addition to emotional and spiritual effects for both you and your partner. Learn about abortion procedures and talk openly with your partner about how this choice may impact you both. If you find yourself disagreeing with your partner regarding the pregnancy decision, we can provide a neutral place where you can talk through your thoughts and both receive support.
Whether you are considering abortion, adoption, or parenting, at First Care we can support you in your role as a father and discuss the impact each option will have on your life. Bring your thoughts, questions, and concerns and schedule an appointment for you and your partner to meet with one of our staff.